Our bodies hold past experiences, and if they are unresolved they can still affect us here and now. Each time we have felt hurt, felt threatened, or not acknowledged in the past our body tightens up a little. This is particularly impactful when it happens to us as children.
Over time this tightening builds layer upon layer until we have a kind of armour. Originally we tensed with the best of intentions, drawing back or freezing to protect ourselves as a way of stopping ourselves being hurt or vulnerable. In time the tension becomes a barrier, as well as separating us from feeling vulnerable to others it stops us being able to feel what is going on inside ourselves.
Thinking about the way we can become cut off from some of our experience counsellor Paul Sibson uses the phrase 'the music heard so deeply it is hardly heard at all.' To me this is an evocative expression of what happens when we have symptoms that we can not explain.
Sometimes a client will come to therapy saying they feel depressed but that they have no reason to, or that they are very anxious but they can not rationalise why. It is as if they have become cut off from their own experience. They can not access the way these feelings have developed or what it is that the emotional messages are calling them to do.
Steve Gilligan describes symptoms as 'spirit waking up.' He suggests that every emotional problem we have is actually a call by our body-mind system asking us to pay attention, and to heal.
Rather than hating or pushing away our symptoms (depression, anxiety, over-thinking, sadness, anger), the path to healing lies in softening, in exploring, even in welcoming them. To understand what is happening we need to come fully into contact with ourselves. Hidden behind protective barriers we can not heal, to do that we need to be fully present and connected.
Any practice that brings you back to your body will assist the understanding and resolution of feelings you can not explain. Walking mindfully in nature, yoga, t'ai chi, stretching, painting, and singing are just a few of the ways you might slow down and relate, letting your body express itself and teach you. When you stop and listen, then the body can release, and change begins to happen.
For support in hearing the soft music within, get in touch to find out more about psychotherapy.
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